A Dream with a Date: October 1, 2023

“A dream written down with a date becomes a goal. A goal broken down into steps becomes a plan. A plan backed by action makes your dreams come true.” - Greg Reid.

2023 I set a goal: By October 1st, 2023, I would move my parents into their new house if I had to drag them kicking and screaming.

My sister passed in January of 2021. That event and the journey afterward are long stories for another day. Knowing it occurred and knowing how completely devastated my family and I were are essential context, however.

My parents sold the family home in the spring of 2022 and spent the next year living and traveling in their fifth wheel. They spent much time on realty websites looking for homes to purchase. They went to look at a good number of houses and even put an offer in on one. My mother had cold feet, and they withdrew their offer because she wasn’t ready to be apart from us. The fifth wheel offered the combination of travel and being close to our home.

By the spring of 2023, they had made an offer accepted by a seller, and the purchase went through. Before they could move into the home, however, a family member became deathly ill and needed round-the-clock care. They were now caretakers for two family members, my uncle, who nearly died, and my grandmother, who he lived with; they were eight hours from their new home.

My parents have been through a lot—more than I can sometimes bear to think about. At some point in this new warren of stress, I decided—decided is not nearly a strong enough word—that I would do whatever it took to get them into their new home by October 1st. I was more determined to accomplish this goal than I had ever been for any other purpose.

During my process of grief over the loss of my sister, I drew great value from writing things down: lists, thoughts, questions, answers, and tools to use. I purchased a new 5x7 notebook that I split into four sections:

1. My parents' new house

2. Grandma and her house

3. My uncle

4. Myself

I wrote down anything and everything my family discussed about these things—any question that cropped up, any thought of what we might do, any solution that could be a possibility—everything. Then, every free moment I had, I dedicated it to tackling all of it, one snippet at a time.

I made phone calls, did online searches, gathered resources, and discussed options with my family to the point of exhaustion on every possible subject. I dug up any scrap of information I thought might be helpful to making the smallest choices.

I missed my target date by one month. My parents moved into their home permanently in November of 2023. What’s one month late after so many months and so much effort and stress? The goal/dream was realized.